Do I Have to Cross This Cultural Bridge Alone?
Written by Marci Renée
I just landed here, and I feel lost, stuck.
Where am I, anyway?
Last month, life felt normal, comfortable. I was living in my home country where I could speak the language, eat the food properly, drive a car safely, get groceries easily, and manage to get money out of an ATM machine.
This month, I don’t know what I’m doing.
I can’t say anything besides “Salaam” when someone spits out Arabic at me a million miles a minute at the corner hanoute.
When I try to eat couscous with my hands, I can’t seem to make “balls” like everyone else, and I get more couscous in my lap than in my mouth.
When I try to get behind the wheel, there don’t seem to be any driving rules. Rather, people honk, scream, and wave their hands at me in disgust.
Groceries? I can’t read the labels in French and Arabic, and apparently, I need to learn to make pancakes from scratch. What in the world!?
I feel lost, stuck, and totally alone.
Prepared—But Not Really
I remember taking some classes on transition and what it’s like to cross borders, languages, and cultures. But, then again, is it possible to really prepare for this? I’m not sure that you can. I now believe that you have to experience such drastic change for yourself to really understand what it’s like. People can try to describe it, but until you live it . . . well, you just don’t get it.
Now I’m here. There’s no turning back. I crossed the ocean to be here, and I want to adjust well. I want to have a smooth transition. I want to make it here, not be one of the statistics of those who throw in the towel, who leave, who don’t survive culture shock.
Where is that “culture shock cycle” graph that I studied in class? Where are these things when I need them? Now is when I need to better understand and process where I am on that transition bridge and figure how to navigate this crazy circus of crossing cultures.
Ready for Help!
I don’t want to walk this bridge alone. I need help. I need a friend—maybe one who has been there, done that. It would be great if that person has walked this road before, someone who can take me by the hand and walk with me through my struggles, one step at a time. I need someone to be my guide and help me read the road signs.
Maybe there is help out there. Maybe I don’t have to be alone to navigate all these changes swirling around me—learning a new language, figuring out how to live in this foreign land, and finding friends.
I can remember hearing about “Personalized Care.”
Akchour, Morocco Photo by mouad bouallayel on Unsplash
What is Personalized Care?
Wouldn’t it be nice to have someone seasoned to walk with you, someone to help you process and navigate life overseas? Having someone journey alongside you on this cross-cultural road can make a huge difference—especially when that “someone” knows first-hand what cross-cultural life in North Africa is like. Personalized Care is an ongoing, intentional relationship that is designed to help you stay healthy and “Do Better, Stay Longer.”
WHY PERSONALIZED CARE?
Everyone deserves to be cared for!
Living in North Africa isn’t easy, and most people come here to improve the lives of others. Honestly, we’re tired of seeing people leave before they’ve even laid the groundwork to accomplish their goals. So we created Personalized Care at an affordable price, because we believe we can help you “Do Better, Stay Longer”
I wonder if that is something that could help me. Maybe it’s time to check it out before I get too lost and stuck.
A Transformed Experience
I started meeting with a See Beyond “Personalized Care” provider. We meet every other week, and it has changed my life.
Don’t get me wrong. Life is still challenging. I’m studying Arabic at a local language school five mornings a week. My brain is packed full and tired. I’m still trying to figure out how to convert the money in my head from U.S. dollars, to Euros, to Dirhams when I go to the outdoor market on Wednesdays. I still can’t help my son with his homework in Arabic, and I’m a long way off from being able to communicate with his teacher. My house helper still can’t understand that I want her to wash my clothes in cold water, not hot, and my dishes in hot water, not cold. I still miss my family back “home,” but I’m trying to find a way to make this new expat and local community my own. My new local friends still don’t believe that I’m allergic to almonds and that I don’t like olives. I don’t want to offend them, but . . .
Yes, life is still challenging, but I’m no longer walking this transition bridge alone. I’m not trying to figure these things out by myself anymore.
It’s made a huge difference for me to have someone to journey with—someone who listens to my stories, my experiences, my joys, my frustrations. Someone who can share with me their own stories and journey, too, so that I can learn from their experiences and wisdom.
Not Walking Alone
Thankfully, my new Personalized Care provider has already walked this road before. They’ve learned three foreign languages, so that gives me hope that I can do it too. I can learn Arabic! They ask me good questions that guide me in processing what I’m going through and feeling, and they even help me come up with some practical action steps to move forward.
Sometimes I’m just lonely, living in a foreign country away from everything that is familiar and comfortable to me. Some days, I just miss my friends and family, baseball games, maple syrup and root beer. On those days, we chat, and I tell them about all the things that I love back in my home country and the things that I miss the most.
Talking about these things gives me courage, gives me hope. Getting these things out in the open gives me strength to face the next day and walk back into my Arabic class. Having someone walk alongside me, someone who has been there and done that before me, empowers me to dream again, get behind the wheel again, walk back through the aisles of the local outdoor market, and try to talk to my house helper again.
I know I can walk this bridge, I know I can take another step. I know that one day I will make it to the other side.
Yes, I can survive culture shock and cultural adjustment too, and I don’t have to do it alone!
Guest author, Marci Renée, along with her French husband and four boys, is a global nomad who has traveled to more than 30 countries and has lived in the United States, France, Morocco, and Spain. She loves to travel, speak foreign languages, experience different cultures, eat ethnic foods, meet people from faraway lands, and of course, write and tell stories. She is a published author of children's picture books, memoirs, short stories, and poetry.
You can find Marci and her books on her website.
"The Cultural Story-Weaver," at www.culturalstoryweaver.com